NO.

No.

Did you catch that complete sentence? You missed it? Two letters. One word, complete sentence. 

I have struggled with this for so long. I've always felt the need to soften "No".  I feel like if say "No", folks will think I'm mean. So instead I'll say something like, "I don't think so" or "Maybe not". I know I'm not the only Divah who struggles with this. Once I realized it was an issue for me, I started paying attention to others. What I noticed is that men have no problem at all saying "No" or "Nah". 

So that made think, why do women feel the need to explain, justify or soften their "No's"? Do we really care that much what others think about us? For me, that's what it came down to; I didn't want to be "The Angry Black Woman".

The thing is, all the soft "No's" were easily persuaded into "Yes'". That means, I spent precious moments of my life doing things I didn't want to do and pretending like I was happy about it. As an introvert, that ish was so draining! I've decided to say "No" without justification or clarification and mean it. 

I tried it yesterday art work and this poor lady just kept staring at me. I'm assuming she was waiting for some reasoning for my answer. When that didn't happen, she continued asking questions...all the answers were No. A complete sentence and I felt good about it. 

Divah Challenge: For the next 24 hours, say "NO" to whatever is no longer serving you; whatever folks are asking you to do that isn't aligning with your spirit, and heck, say it just for fun. No reasoning, No explanation, No justification.

Let me know how it goes in the comment section below.